Let’s be honest, the dating game is a demanding jungle. You’ll find yourself spending hours on Tinder, only to end up on a painfully awkward date with someone, who is nothing like their given online persona. Dating can be hard, and it seemingly gets more discouraging as you get older.
With that in mind, I’ve developed a few simple dating rules. I’ve found that applying them to my love life has kept me from wasting time in relationships that don’t indicate a clear future. Time is precious! And no-one wants to spend another evening of awkward small talk, when you could be snuggling up to your new partner. It’s not a lot to ask for, but damn, it’s hard to find.
- Don’t waste your time with the wrong people
One main trick to dating is to narrow your field from the beginning. If you keep your heart open to anyone, you’re likely to end up dissatisfied. Start by pin pointing qualities that you are attracted to in others. That’s where online dating can be quite useful. For example, if you’re looking for a lesbian relationship, focus on gay dating sites exclusively. Seeking out your desired standards might mean it will take longer to find the appropriate date, but it also means you’re more likely to experience a real connection.
- Know exactly what you want from a partner
You can save yourself a hell of a lot of wasted time and effort if you’re confident about what you want. Do you see yourself with someone low key, who is always down to watch movies and cuddle, or someone who is constantly seeking adventure and spontaneity? More importantly, what do you expect from a partner long-term? Do you want a a marriage or family? These are tough questions to ask on a first date, but you can find the answers subtly if you look. Know what you want, and do not continue a relationship with someone with an incompatible outlook.
- Go to your favorite places to meet people
As accurate as dating websites can be, sometimes the real world holds more intriguing opportunities. If you’re truly looking for someone with similar tastes and lifestyle to yours, try looking in your favorite hang out spots. Spend time in your local book store. Hang around the local record shop, or while away an afternoon in your favorite coffee outlet. Spark up conversations with others, and you’re bound to find mutual interests. Don’t be afraid to put yourself out there. It’s one of the best ways to meet a new partner.
- Trust your instincts
Statistics show that people can tell if a date is successful within just 15 minutes. Our instincts are usually pretty spot on, yet we keep ignoring them. It’s not fair to put hope in a person changing themselves, solely to fit your own desires. If it’s not working, accept it, and move on. It’s not always going to be love at first sight, but there should be a definitive spark or connection almost immediately.