Being open to and actually searching for true love isn’t always as easy as putting a personal profile on a popular dating site. I believe there are some steps that prepare us for finding that special someone. Some of these steps are physical tasks and some are emotional ones that bring clarity and peace. So let’s dig in and chat about how to find true love faster.
Make Sure You Are Ready for Love
Finding someone to do life with on a deeply connected level generally appeals to the majority of people. However, this core need to be loved and to love can get us into trouble if we’re not ready for a relationship of this nature. Truthfully, being lonely is not really a good enough reason to jump into anything serious. It’s important to love and have peace with ourselves as we are alone before we offer up a partnership.
Here are some other reasons you might want to think twice about getting involved:
- You’ve recently come out of a relationship and haven’t had time to seek closure.
- You don’t feel confident in your skin and could benefit from an investment of time and self-care.
- You are focused on other important things like career, children, taking care of parents, school, etc.
Ultimately, the place you want to be before starting a relationship is one of complete contentment. You feel happy with who you are and where you are going. I believe when we truly achieve this zen space, our true love will show up if we are open.
Know What You Want
Even when you are ready for love, it’s best to define what that looks like for you. Write out your top needs and desires that are non-negotiable. That way you know that if you don’t see them show up while dating someone, it’s not likely you have found the “one” yet.
Keep in mind, it’s OK if you are not sure how far you want to take a relationship as it begins. These things take time and can often take twists and turns before they land. Your list of intentions, needs, and desires is really an outline for you, so you stay on track and don’t compromise too much when you’re dating. For example, one of your non-negotiables is you want someone who loves kids. You realize that you’ve only dated those who don’t care for kids, you have to ask yourself what future do you have together.
Also, here are several things that can happen when finding that special someone:
- Casual sex and physical intimacy.
- He/she becomes a good friend but not a long-term partner.
- Find ‘the one’ and begin the process of settling down.
Relationships evolve and change over time. Nonetheless, you should take the time to understand what you want before you begin seriously dating. Doing so gives you a greater chance of recognizing a good match and true love when they show up.
Become More Desirable Inside and Out
True love comes from compatibility in many areas. Some of which are intellectual, emotional, physical, values, religious or political views, and having your proverbial “shit” together. Of course, many of these things are often hidden until you really get to know someone. For this reason, physical appearance can play a huge role in initial attraction to someone.
Here are a few areas you can focus on:
- Don’t ever be desperate or needy.
- Focus on your appearance, self-confidence, and posture.
- Become more successful in other aspects of life.
Listen to Your Gut
Have you ever heard the saying, “If something doesn’t feel right, it probably isn’t.”? Well, this can be directly applied to relationships and meeting new people you are considering for romantic involvement. Unfortunately, we live in a world where things (and people) aren’t always as they seem. There are predators out there who will take advantage of vulnerable women.
Men can have one thing on their minds when entering a dating situation and will go to great lengths to secure their prey. Many even use tools like the unlock her legs the scrambler program to psychologically manipulate women to give them sex. It is, therefore, imperative that you listen to your gut and do your research thoroughly before going too far with someone. After all, you don’t want to waste your time with someone who is never going to be what you want and need.
Put Yourself Out There
One key to finding that special someone is to put yourself in places you can be seen. Keep in mind, your special person is out there looking for someone, too. If he/she can’t see you, that match made in heaven isn’t going to happen.
Many men like dating sites that encourage meeting a woman online while others like to be more organic. Of course, we all have varying opinions about this topic. Think about what things you can do to meet more people in general. If a dating site is for you, find one that uses techniques that will give you the results you want.
Consider Outside Influencers
When you start dating someone new, your main focus should be on each other. However, you may have others to consider, such as children, parents, roommates, etc. This can get complicated if you both have others who come with the package. It’s important to consider how your relationship affects these other people, especially kids. You don’t want them to get close to someone only to end up breaking up a few months later.
Who are the people you should consider?
- Your children from past relationships, as well as their biological father.
- His/her children from past relationships.
- Parents, grandparents, and other close relatives.
- Their closest friends and colleagues that you may meet.
While you don’t need to spend all your time learning how to make future in-laws love you, it’s a good idea to be aware of the relationship dynamic. Be kind and considerate, but always be clear with your lover about potential problems you see.