Going through an amicable divorce can be challenging, let alone if it’s messy. Dissolving a marriage can strongly impact both your mental and physical health, leaving you feeling run down, overwhelmed and invalid. Unfortunately, this is a situation that requires you to feel and walk through the pain to get to the other side. Remember, you chose to split up for a reason that was painful as well. Navigating a divorce isn’t easy, but there are some things that I strongly recommend for the best outcome. Read on for some tips to help you along the way.
Hire a Quality Attorney
It’s extremely important that you obtain a lawyer for yourself, even if your spouse has already hired one. This is not something you want to mess with, especially if you have children, property, and/or financial assets. Yes, it will cost you more upfront, but you need someone who is unbiased and fighting for your rights. Don’t settle for someone that you don’t feel comfortable with either. You want your lawyer to be supportive and skillful to guide you through one of the most challenging events of your life.
If money is an issue, there are some who work on a sliding scale or even pro-bono. Additionally, fixed fee divorce solicitors are also available for those who have to stay in control of their budget. No matter what your budget is, take time to research your options thoroughly. It also helps to speak to those who have gone through the process of hiring an attorney for a divorce. Knowing that you have solid representation helps you to relax as much as possible, so you can move through this transition healthfully.
Take Care of Yourself
Though taking care of yourself might not happen easily while navigating a divorce, it’s necessary for emotional stability. Watch out for you during this stressful time because there might not be anyone else that will. Yes, you need to be strong and take care of business, but not allowing time to rest and heal will come back to bite you in the ass later.
For example, staying up late to read through legal documents will only cause unrest, distraction, and fatigue. Try to set a time to do “divorce” stuff, as opposed to being consumed with it 24/7. Do also schedule time to rest and recharge, as though you are making an appointment with someone important. This “appointment” can be to go out with some friends or to binge-watch a comedy series. When you take time out for self care, it strengthens you physically and emotionally for whatever your facing. Even small snippets of time just for you can recharge your mind and body.
Ask for Help
It might feel like you live in loneliest place on Earth, but there is help out there. Reach out to family, friends, or even a therapist for support during this challenging time. Though they might not understand exactly what you’re going through, having a support team helps you to stay strong and focused. Do also remember, if you have kids, they need support as well. Asking for help shows them that community and communication is important. I recommend asking for not only emotional support but physical.
Breaking up a family is likely going to have consequences that you might not have thought of. Perhaps your lawn isn’t getting cared for because your spouse used to take care of it. Maybe the children aren’t getting a lot of attention because they played the most with the person who is no longer there. These and many other examples could be real to your situation. It’s up to you to ask for what you need. Sometimes, others don’t know what to say or do, so they back off. Speak up and be heard.
Navigating a divorce is not normally a pleasant task for anyone involved. As a woman, it can be even more difficult for multiple reasons, such as caring for children and having a career. Furthermore, a woman’s emotions can be more heightened than her male counterpart’s. You owe it to yourself to be kind to yourself, giving ample time to process the emotions and tasks. A good Lawyer will help you get through the legal stuff. You focus on getting you and your family through the rest.