We have all read about them, seen them on TV, and some of us have experienced them. Toxic relationships can be destructive, addictive, and notorious for ending in heartbreak. The problem is that once someone is caught up in one, it can feel almost impossible to detangle from it.
Some reasons for staying in a toxic relationship are being emotionally dependent on a partner, too afraid to leave, or personal identity has been eroded over time. To a wounded soul, it can appear easier to stay in an unhealthy, dysfunctional relationship rather than go through the turmoil of a breakup. In this case, it takes a plan and willingness to change. Know that recovering from a toxic relationship once you get out isn’t easy either. Let’s take a look some things that might help.
Understand That You Deserve Better
One of the most difficult aspects of escaping a toxic relationship and experiencing recovery is believing that a healthy connection with someone is actually possible. Furthermore, lacking self-love and respect is often the culprit that puts women in these situations in the first place. Those with low self-esteem tend to attract partners who take advantage of this low energy. Feeling not deserving of love and respect can stem from self-judgment about weight, age, job, or any other perceived shortcomings.
This type of breakdown will take some time and maybe even professional counseling to remedy. However, there are some simple things we all can do to increase our self-esteem. It starts with ending the comparison game and habit to judge every little thing. Also, surround yourself with friends and relatives who are in meaningful, healthy relationships. This will reassure you that there is good love out there, allowing you to raise the standards for what you accept in a relationship.
Look After Your Physical Health
Unfortunately, toxic relationships can have a negative effect on physical health. It’s imperative to pay attention to in order to get back on track. One thing that I find helpful after any kind of trauma is giving my diet a complete overhaul it’s not easy, but I ditch the carby or sugar-laden comfort foods . I then turn to healthful foods like fresh fruit and vegetables, lean protein, and healthy fats, and enjoy treats in moderation.
Exercise can also be a big help in recovering from a toxic relationship. Going for a run or hitting the gym is great for clearing the mind and helping to heal the body and mind It is especially beneficial if you can get outdoors – fresh air can do a world of good!
Additionally, don’t forget to catch up on all of the routine health appointments that you may have missed – cervical smear tests, dental hygiene check-ups, eye check-ups, and so on. You might also want to consider having your sexual health checked too. You can actually do a full STI panel through your doctor or online kits are available as well. Should you find that you have a problem, there are sites that offer things like chlamydia treatment online if needed. This will protect your own health and that of any future partners.
Surround Yourself with Positive Influences
It may sound corny, but surrounding yourself with positive influences may have a profound effect on your outlook. It is essential to fill your life with soul-enriching activities and other sources of joy as you move forward. Complete your life by focusing on the things that make you happy – family, friends, work, and hobbies.
This is the time to capitalize on your capabilities and enjoy the new life you are about to take on. During this healing period, surround yourself with people who will bring light and happiness into your life. These people will support, care for, and encourage you to do what is best for you.
Work on Forgiveness
If you have spent months or even years with someone who undermines your self-worth, it’s likely that there is some residual resentment, anger, or even hate. This might be so profound that forgiveness appears impossible. For this reason, many women feel they need to heal first before even considering forgiving someone who hurt them. However, forgiveness is a powerful act that is really for the forgiver not the person being forgiven. Because forgiveness is a conscious and intentional action, it can bring back vigor, opportunity, and integrity to your life.
Remember Who You Are
Bad relationships can make it difficult to recall who you were before the toxicity began to erode your self-esteem. Furthermore, it may have completely stolen dreams, goals, and passions that you once had. People in dysfunctional relationships frequently begin to lose themselves, forget themselves, and their happiness is usually no longer a priority. It takes guts to recognize and face when a relationship has run its course, as it can also be tough to imagine life without your partner. Self-compassion is essential for surviving the fallout from leaving this type of relationship. This process requires coming to know yourself and your worth.
Take Practical Steps
When powerful emotions are involved, what you decide one day may not be remembered the next. You can leave your partner and then give him or her another opportunity hours later. This is not unlike an addict returning to drugs or alcohol right after she decided to quit. The pain of letting go of something you’ve relied on sets in and begs for attention once again.
It might be helpful to journal your emotions daily so you have concrete evidence of how your partner affects you. We frequently mix up sentiments and facts, and we are prone to making excuses for our loved ones, such as they were tired, stressed, ill, drunk, etc. Having feelings and events written down provides irrefutable proof of how you felt, what was said, what your partner did to upset you, and so on. Evidence, evidence, and more evidence. Do this during a split and for some time after, as you are likely going to experience many ups and downs through the process.