You don’t have to hate your significant other to want to break up. Things happen that are out of your control and feelings change. Ending the relationship may be the best thing for you both. Furthermore, breaking up doesn’t have to look like a world war or leave one of you in the dark. Here are a few tips to end a relationship with someone you still care for.
Still caring for your S.O. as your relationship draws to a close does make things a little tricky. A part of you will want to hold on to the love you had, especially if you have children or have been together for a long time. This emotional upheaval might bring out the worst in you, so be careful to communicate your feelings as well as possible. He/she will also be on edge through the process. You will want to be mature and end things amicably. Keep in mind, saying goodbye is never easy, but you can do it healthily and with dignity.
In order to circumvent this delicate situation, you must put yourself in your partner’s position and have empathy. You have to imagine he/she is calling time on your relationship, not you. What you would expect from this situation, more importantly, how would it make you feel? How would you react, as well as how would you want to be broken up with? If you’d much prefer it to be a face-to-face meeting, for instance, then make sure to take into account that your partner may want that too.
Ultimately, I recommend doing and saying what lines up with who you are or who you want to be. Even if bad events have led up to the breakup, try to end things with integrity and love. Fights and unwelcome behavior can make you temporarily lose sight of positive emotions. But don’t be fooled. These are normal reactions to adversity and conflict. You can love someone but not be able to be with him/her. I’ve experienced this many times myself.
Regardless of whether you think your partner is at fault for the demise of your relationship or not, it’s still best not to assign blame to him/her. That kind of personal attack could lead anyone down a dark path post-breakup. Always look at yourself first if you’re looking for reasons the relationship is no longer valid. Use “I” statements when discussing how you feel. Say things like:
“I longer feel comfortable being in this relationship.”
“I see different things for us.”
“I want a chance to change and be myself.”
Sort Out Financial Affairs Amicably
Whether you have joint bank accounts or co-own real estate or investments, sort out your financial affairs promptly and amicably. Nobody is going to benefit from the other making harsh, unnecessary demands. And greed will just make everything far more hurtful and awkward than it needs to be. Remember the love you had and still have for your partner, as well as consider the needs of both parties.
If it’s a divorce, contact a practical and empathetic family lawyer Bristol as soon as possible. Doing so will expedite the logistics of your situation without unfairness and unneeded strife. An attorney can handle prenuptial agreements, cohabitation issues, and, of course, child support and custody.
Ending a relationship with someone you still care for will take you all over the board as far as your emotions. Remember to take care of your mental and emotional health. Take time to grieve and process your new situation before you start any new relationships. If your partner isn’t willing to be as kind as you want to be, let him/her go with grace and maturity.