Life is a journey, filled with ups and downs, treacherous water, hazardous cliffs, deserts that seem unending, and a few insurmountable walls. We come into it fresh, new, and sometimes angry with our push into this cold, cruel world. After all, we were warm, had all the food available without effort, the soft murmur of a steady beat to keep us company, even ambient lighting. Now we have a reality that is too light, too dark, too hot, too cold, and what’s that? Hunger? Wailllll!
Cruel. That’s how I used to think of my world. Now, after I’ve waited out my usual morning dream recap, I wake up looking for the good to happen, thankful for all the good that has already happened. Is every morning that way? No. I’m still human. I have off days. But probably most of them. As I go through my list of what to do that day I can’t help but be grateful for what I’ve already achieved. Especially on a personal level.
I don’t mind saying I have the best sex life ever. Probably better than anyone else’s. I know that sounds egotistical, but that is how content I am, with where I am, in that area in my life. I’ve achieved the pinnacle of success in that area of my life. But not before I swam through a lot of dry flavorless valleys. Actually I wasn’t swimming; I was pretending to doggy paddle and really drowning.
My goal in the next year is to share success with you. I want to help you graduate to doggy paddling, then to swimming, and then maybe you can join me in the flight to the stars. I’ve got some topics I want to cover, which I’ll list below but if you have questions, or want advice, please feel free to write. I’ll share whatever I can in wholesome, self-authenticating, techniques.
OK, so my articles are supposed to be about sex and I wrote not one gratuitous hot sentence in this whole intro. ::sigh:: Has it really come to that? Guess you’ll have to wait for another article. 😉 Till then… keep paddling.
- Role-play in the bedroom
- Role-play out of the bedroom
- Alternative health and sex
- healthy in the head equals healthy in the bed
- He can’t get it up
- Ack! Now I can’t get it up!
- Finding the flash point
- Overcoming childhood trauma
- Finding the one
- Keeping the one
- Is this kinky?
- Romance is a dead language
- Places that sizzle
- Keeping the rapist out of your head
- Toy reviews
- Lingerie how to, and don’t evers
- How to find the perfect corset for your body type
- Bdsm, yes or no?
Sex is definitely not my strong suit right now. I could use a little revamping of my mojo! It’s been a tough road the past couple of years with my separation-getting back together-separation-getting back together thing. I really think I need to learn how to enjoy myself again, to let go and experience pleasure the way its meant to be. It’s hard to feel feminine and sexy when there is so much emotional junk in your primary relationship. But I’m working on it.
Learning to enjoy yourself is really the first step to sexual freedom. I believe a big part of the popularity of the book 50 Shades of Gray lies in the fact that we often want to make someone else responsible for our happiness, on in this case, sexual pleasure. Real bdsm is a lot more complicated a dance than what is represented in that book but the concept is often what draws people into that lifestyle. By taking responsibility ourselves we also empower ourselves to enjoy life no matter where the other person is. It’s a beautiful thing when there is a partner to share pleasure with but in the end it all starts in our brain.
When life is tough, no matter what the reason, we need to take the extra measures to make ourselves feel lovely, sexy, beautiful. You’ve taken a tremendous jump in the last year, once the rush of that accomplishment is past move forward again with your next goal, but don’t forget to nurture your sexual self along the way. ::hugs::
Nice to meet you Elisabeth, and great topic! I have a great partner, who is very attentive, but I find my head gets in the way of letting go. I recently came across a video link of a presentation Naomi Wolf did at the Miami Book Fair regarding her new book Vagina: The New Biography, and some of it resonated with me. It’s about the brain-vagina connection.
I look forward to reading your articles, learning along the way, and finding out if I can shut my thinking out of the moment.
Hi Sandy! I would definitely check out that book. I think most women have the problem of their head getting in the way. Sometimes that’s just a matter of pace or the need for more variety. My vagina is definitely ruled by my brain. Maybe that’s why I find geeky guys sexy. 😉 You will be able to do that if you work towards that goal. I used to have that problem a lot, not so much any more and as much as I adore my partner he isn’t the reason. Not that he doesn’t bring some great stuff to the table but I conquered a lot of my problems before I met him and that was one of them. I will definitely be discussing that topic here in at least one article too.
Holy cow. Sure hope you could interpret that jumble I left last night. Apparently I need a new rule. No posting super late at night without checking and double checking to make sure it makes sense. What I meant was that I’m sure you will be able to get your head out of the way with the use of some techniques and maybe a bit of stubborn tenacity. Good luck!